December Astrology Overview 2012 With Michele Knight

Promises Promises ...

 

Ah, the missing, or should I say "hiding" photo I thought went astray. I'd like to call this TIME ... beyond 4:20........

this is a bronze lamp of a woman with a large sunflower frame for the clock ... she needs polishing for sure! At the base are more sunflowers and I bought her in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan a very long time ago. There were times I could get the clock to work, but I have enough clocks. I have been thinking of turning it into a picture frame...hey! maybe of sunflowers!? But I made this my desktop background so it would be darker in here when Tuffy Boy is sleeping. He's used to us being on the computer clacking away ... when he isn't outside in this freezing weather! It saddens me that he always wants to be out there and not inside with us...no matter the weather, unless it is a massive downpour or blizzard ... but if it isn't ... he wants to be out there. He's my wild child, but I digress...

 

I put it on the background on Sunday night ... when Daylight Savings Time here in Michigan meant we had to "fall back" and "gained" an hour ... an imaginary hour, I feel. The body gets used to the rhythms of the "time" and you can't fake the mind and body out with some false hour we are convinced we are given, only to have it taken away next April ... who needs to 'save' the daylight? Why don't they have Moonlight Savings Time? that'd be for me!!! Lately I come home around 6 pm and it is already very dark outside. The "time" changed and I am still not used to it, though it felt nice to "feel" like I could go into work an hour later today ... but how long can you bleed that idea dry? If you get ONE hour ... surely you can't keep repeating that hour over and over ... and I love that this clock face is set at 4:27 ... beyond "4:20" that old craziness that someone somewhere made up as the "time to smoke marijuana" ... like a secret society or some password at a forbidden door. So I am going BEYOND that and returning once again to how things were as a teenager and young adult woman ... when so many said, "What are you ON?" because laughing and smiling and being kind and loving ... and did I say LAUGHING? And I  heard, "Why do you laugh all the time?" and got tired of that and would reply, "I can cry for you, too, if you'd rather!" (which was and is true!) i am a drop-of-the-hat laugher and cryer and I don't do "LOL"s either ... if I need to exhibit a laugh as I'm typing a post on facebook or here, I usually have to do HAHAHA! Yes, it takes more keystrokes, but at 120 wpm who gives a crapola?

And I don't have any magical techie thing to make you see the second hand move, either ... like: "If you see this river moving, you must fwd it to 20 people in 10 minutes or your life will be damned!" Damned if I do, damned if I don't ... I'm changing that around to:

I AM BLESSED IF I DO, BLESSED IF I DON'T!!!

It just resonates with me better.

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Been feeding feral kitties behind the dumpster at work for many years now ... was asked by mgmt to stop 3 times a few yrs ago so I did...for one year...until I saw kittens standing there in the cold ... then I said, to hell with the mgmt, I don't have the stamina or fortitude to try and rescue these babies, but at least I can contribute to them having some nourishment and perhaps keeping them healthy and alive in some way. I have gotten flack from friends and strangers telling me I NEED TO rescue them ... Well, you go rescue them ... I'll keep feeding and watering them ... and giving them my beloved long winter shawl for some warmth ... but today, after knowing workers were redoing the parking lot and being able to tippy toe thru the tar or asphalt on Sunday to get to their spot where I know they rely on me coming ... TODAY I cried when I realized the new paving was taken right to where they come out from under a cement wall behind the dumpster wooden walls...so that there isn't enough room at all for even a tiny kitten to crawl under ... and I had to keep shoving food under the small opening and immed saw the kitten (1 of 2) come to eat...just made me sad, but I am determined to find a way ... if anyone were to try and rescue them, it will be much more difficult now that there's no way to get to them ... and they would always squeeze under that opening and come eat their lunch or dinner and drink some water ... of course, I've also seen racoons and oppossums eating and drinking their food also  which is why I don't leave too much at a time and hope they come soon to get it. That made me cry but we'll find a way ... there are other openings intermittently down the wall, just don't have the shelter that being behind the dumpster does and all out in the open. When the snow falls and they plow it against that cement wall, there are never any openings either, and I have trudged through knee deep snow often to put cans of mushy food on top of the wall where the cats would climb the trees on the other side and get up there ... and of course, so did a possum once and just stared at me with that goofy grin ... but don't know about the kittens ... they are about 5 weeks old now, I think ... the mama is black with green eyes that usually will look at me just once, like saying, "go now" or "thank you" and she has 4 white paws and short white whiskers ... I named her Bootsie but she doesn't really know that. I pray for Bootsie and her babies often and I hope you will, too.

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Today I also cried, though unsure why, except for the fact that since last February, I've only been able to take the most direct route to work about 1-1/2 wks in June and today was the 1st time I could go to work in half the time, driving half the miles, as the 2nd bridge that was worked on was completed enough to open to traffic. People say there aren't any jobs ... but there's been nonstop road construction around here forever and ever! to the point where I want to scream when i see those orange and white barrels!!! There was road construction on 5-6!!! routes I'd come up with just to get 4 miles away from home! Even a few barrels just outside our parking lot! And now the lot is beautifully and newly paved ... to the detriment of "my" kitties ... but I know in my heart something good will happen for them...at least I'll get to work more directly and quicker ... hey! I can be less late than usual - tee hee (oh, yes, I do 'tee hee' also, just no LOLs since I am NOT laughing out loud, I am sitting here in quiet, only the keys rattling, clacking away, HAHA'ng to myself, or an occasional TEEHEE'g ;o) (or that dumb smiley face with a wink)

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OK, this is just more posting than I've done in years, I think! My  nephew Jacob Watson got me going today after I got him going on his blog again ... which i was so proud to hear. He is a damned good writer and a funny young man and a bleeding heart liberal and a kind, loving guy who is nice to know....then there was the fact that going to HIS blog made me go to MY blog which made me see some very nice comments from old friends Rhi and Dancin' who I cherish more than they'll ever know ... and then I think I've been sitting here ignoring all the shitty political automated phone calls on the answering machine to the point that I just turned the ans mach down so I couldn't hear them. Come on, people! 8-12 calls a day for the Republican party???? Don't you know that only makes me want to go vote for OBAMA even more now???

You see, I have become my old APOLITICAL self ... one of my favorite songs is by Little Feat called Apolitical Blues ... listen to it sometime as I don't know how to post it here just now ... and I did start voting AGAINST people and forced myself to become a voter ... until I became disenfranchised with it all and mistrustful ... and had decided that this election I was NOT going to vote at all! UNTIL!!! I kept receiving these goddamn calls and mail over and over by the same party, with only a few, very few, from the Democratic party. I do not affiliate myself with any party and it is sad that my votes are usually AGAINST someone more than FOR someone ... but just today I have decided I will go tomorrow mornign with my husband before I go in to work from 10am to 8 pm for 2 psychiarists @;@ <(my eyes!) to my elementary school I attended eons ago (since I am nearly 61 now! and attended this school system K-12 and on any given day can drive past all three schools I went to!!! which is in itself real freaky!) and vote for OBAMA ... the absolute best choice I could make ... I hope ... have to keep hope in my heart or I become apathetic. I remember that old saying from the '70s: "What is apathy? Ans: Who cares?" Apathy hurts me and doesn't do much for anyone else, either, but it does exist and can't deny it. So I will FORCE myself to vote ... because sometimes we just have to do what we should do and not always what we want.

Goodnight now ... husband won't be home for at least 2 more hours...but I feel I have spent some good time ignoring the dishes in the sink and the laundry in the basket by BLOGGING! Let's hope I can keep my promise and come back here again soon ... and perhaps I won't find the need to TYPE SO MUCH!!! I can't imagine who would want to read this much ... but it was cathartic writing it all. Must've been that movie SAMSARA I wrote about with fierceness...or the commentary posts by some friends 2 months ago that i just saw ... in any event, I did it ... that was my first sentence I ever spoke according to my Baby Book kept by my mother for maybe 1-1/2 years until my brother was born and it became just too much to do. My first words were: DADA, JO (?? my mom's name instead of MAMA??) and BUFF (our dog Buffer I only remember from photos) and I DID IT!

YOU DO IT, TOO!

Love from

your

SisSTAR

Kylita

XOXOXO

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(poof!)

(whew!)

 



 

Wanting to add some beauty and interest since the post I just typed below is really not what I intended, but it's what happened ... sending you love from

your SisSTAR

*****

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XO

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Blogger has changed somewhat since my "olden days" and it's frustrating to me. Just tried to post a photo and I don't know where it ended up?? So I will plug along and just say that I have been on my blog for a few moments after having encouraged my nephew to keep writing and he posted something thanking me...well, that just got me going and I've found comments from friends and even strangers that I hadn't known about for over 2 months. See what happens when I'm 'liking' mind numblingly on facebook everyday?? or playing solitaire like a crazy loon...fast as I can and frantic?? And why?? Who knows...gets rid of heart palpitations sometimes because I think it just takes my mind off things I'd rather not have it on.

Saw a movie last night with my husband at an art theatre in Royal Oak ... called SAMSARA. I'd picked up a postcard with the most interesting photo and words about it at our favorite vegetarian restaurant Inn Season ... and the movie ended up being shown in the same town...so we went back the next night to see it. We went so excitedly right after watching Once Upon on Time on TV ... so happy to go to a movie! an art movie! And we were laughing and feeling so nice and good and welcoming a diversion ... and it was stunningly beautiful for about halfway through it ... and then it became so very disturbing i went from hardly being able to look at certain things to crying and hiding my eyes (thru partly open fingers) and feeling so bad that I'd subjected Jeffrey to this movie I'd looked so fwd to seeing ... it took 5 years and 25 countries with much time lapsed photography and it seemed as if it would be a vision feast ... well, it was feast and it was vomitous! It would have been a good ad, in the middle of a PETA organizational video ... horrors of how "meat" animals were treated ... I don't even want to give you any visuals ... I was so grateful I had become vegetarian for over a year ... and I do believe Jeff is highly considering it now also. He told me it reminded him of when he was a child and what would have to happen to eat the meat animals ... and how it horrified him then and this did now too.

But not just the animals...cultures in and of themselves that made me realize how "Made in China" or many other countries that crank out items after items ... or meat or you name it ... life size female sex dolls that looked unbelievably real ... all naked either upside down or right side up ... tons of 'em ... and all the technological WASTELANDS with difficult to watch people wading through toxic sludge to find something that may be saleable somewhere in it all ... to ski resorts built INSIDE at Dubai in the desert! and then there was 2 men who seemed like twins but the one had sort of strange eyes and I thought perhaps he had some affliction ... and his face kept twitching and wincing ... you never knew what country you were in or what was what for the most part ... and the credits were flying by so fast, it was hard to read and you can imagine 5 yrs worth and 25 countries! Well, turns out that guy with the winching face was a CLONE! of the other man who looked like his "better" twin!!! OMG!

There WERE gorgeous visuals and ethereal music emanating often and I absolutely love time lapsed photography esp of landscapes and all the sun/shadow/moon/stars going by ... beautiful monasteries with Tibetan monks playing wondrous instruments and oriental dancers and palaces and desert sands that had obviously been enormous storms that invaded homes that you didn't know if the homes had been emptied out before or after being piled halfway up the walls with sand in every way possible.

I felt somewhat betrayed by a movie I expected to be beautiful beyond what I'd seen for a long time and in the beginning I felt so peaceful and serene and my legs would shake with the excitement of the gorgeous scenery and music blending together. Then mid-way thru...horror struck. And this was no special effects ... this was cultural humanity shockingly brutal and perverted and plain sickening. If I could be so ... well...asking to much of anyone ... I would suggest that everyone! should see it so maybe they wouldn't keep buying the latest and greatest new tech invention or eat animals that are not even slaughtered...just plowed through, chickens sucked into a big machine being driven right into them as we watched ... and many young pink baby piglets suckling at what you see of their mother's teats only to eventually see what the mother was contained in ... big heavy barred cage which she bulged out of, no room to move an inch ... just like she was a blob that no one would care a thing about...except maybe those piglets who needed something to eat ... and then pan right to a factory of massive amounts of employees with their slash here/ rip open there, haul out guts and fling 'em down and repeat ... over and over...all day long...big white hogs hanging, heads gone, looking unbelievably like humans being gutted ... I am so sorry for anyone who might be reading this who wished they weren't. At least you aren't seeing the movie ... now from me ... and I am either warning you NOT to ... or daring you TO see it ... but I wouldn't ask anyone to see it on my account, because it was an assault to my sensitivities ... I love MOTHER EARTH so much ... and animals ... I hold them right up there as important as I am ... and after watching the factories it panned over to huge fat people (and I am quite heavy myself, so I'm not making fun of them) at fast food places gobbling down hamburgers ... not knowing or caring where that meat came from. When I used to say "mystery meat" I no longer can do that ... it's not a mystery...it comes from SUFFERING!

I didn't intend to write on this movie, but I guess I have to exorcise it from my senses. Jeff adn I spoke about it today ... I usually am one to rattle on and talk talk talk about this and that ... we went home in silence and I didn't want to make him listen to one thing that I felt about it nor expect him to talk about what he felt, either. I apologized to him profoundly today for subjecting him to what he saw. I am glad he doesn't have dreams he remembers and also that I am not prone to nightmares.

Does it mean that that word Samsara, Sanskrit for changing ways on the wheel of life ... has to be SOOOO very extreme to open up to beauty like spectacular scenery and divine sounding voices singing ... to chaotic horrors of what some people have boiled down to ... a pulsing beat of music with beautiful women clad in bikinis with numbers attached to them ... holding the pole and dancing sexily around, smiling (the rare people who actually were smiling in the movie) and I suppose they were being rented or purchased or ?? and in the credits realizing that ALL of them were actually boys or men. Go to the extremes of the insane riches being poured into Dubai ... pump that oil...reap that greed and make sure you build the impossible...what you thought was mountains in some very cold region where skiiers were flying all over, you realized was INSIDE an enormous enclosure in the desert!

My favorite was some aboriginal people from I didn't know where with mud all over in their creatively coifed hair ... lots of orangey red mud ... like big thick dreadlocks ... babies shining and sleeping strapped on their backs ... large eyes of the men and women looking like brown and bloodshot watery pools staring at you and never smiling ... lips stretched way out so that they hung down to their chin bottoms and ears so stretched beyond capacity that they hung there ripped to just two flaps down to their shoulders ...

Then I think of WE ARE ALL ONE ... TEACH TOLERANCE ... LOVE ONE ANOTHER ... ONE LOVE, ONE GOD, JUSTICE FOR ALL etc etc............and the face of a CLONE twitches and blinks staring right into your own eyes ... not a robot, nor a machine ... a flesh covered human being CLONE. This Mother Earth of ours holds what seems like a megalomaniacal Intruder who throws humanity around as if it's some bizarre video game where anything goes ... ANYTHING at all... NOTHING at all ... The WHEEL OF LIFE .........................the best I can say is that I will CHOOSE WHO I AM and I will pledge to be THE ONE I AM ... and do my utmost best to not judge but try to understand ... there are over 7 billion people on Mother Earth, I believe. When I graduated from high school in 1970 there were 3.4 billion ... as I had to make a speech in front of the entire high school (and I was a shy girl then) about population control ... the POPULATION BOMB! It is here and we are us.........................HELP US! What is Humanity? Wailing walls and massive, massive!!!! processions bulging out of males prostrating themselves in Mecca seen from way up in the air down below in time lapsed fashion ... it was unbelievable! It looked like the cows going around in a giant stainless steel appearing factory ... all hooked up to milking machines squeezed as close together as they could on a huge WHEEL turn around and around slowly as the cows could not move, just be sucked dry of their milk that no doubt they were forced to produce at volumes that were impossible ... in NATURE ... but this wasn't NATURE as I knew it or as I ever wanted to know it.

BLESS THOSE GODFORSAKEN PEOPLE AND ANIMALS ... and ...........well, I am too spent to go on ... writing can be exhausting. The brain is going like a sleek train flying at the speed of insane thoughts ... the fingers can't keep up ... wanting to weave a cohesive essay here...not sure I've done that and asking your forgiveness for any assault to your own sensibilities ... I am forever in your gratitude for even bothering to read this...............LOVE ONE ANOTHER ... KINDNESS AND COMPASSION, EMPATHY ... UNDERSTANDING ... I feel like a visitor from outer space after viewing those visions! I don't want the Wheel of Life to contain 90% of those things. I always am a proponent of the word PEACE ... what does that mean to everyone? Something very different, I assume.

PEACE to you, my brothers and sisters ... my SisSTARS ... let us strive to be ourselves and know that perhaps all that is illusion and we will one day WAKE UP! and see the beauty in ourselves and in each other ... knowing that we have been kind, loving and generous ... and looked within because looking without is too damned painful.

Ain't that just the way things are ... ??

 

Noon on Wednesday ...



Hello again!

Photo of tiny little fairy a friend brought over to our home for a little "photo shoot". She made an excellent model except for falling and hiding in the grass and bushes a few times. We had lots of fun with her and it inspired me to look around the house for other little "folks" to photograph.

Some of you may remember my stories of Winky and Dinka ... little goofy stories I made up to remember my cousin Walt (Wink) and brother Dana (Dinka) after they'd died six years ago. Then Wink's brother Gary (above left--Gnary) also died 5 mos later so mysteriously, without knowing, a nice neighbor put that little gnome in my mailbox for me to find. When I saw these mushrooms growing like crazy by the side door, I knew there was another photo shoot in the making! I took lots! of them but here is just one for my bloggie souls out there. I also LOVE the chrysacolla gemstones I used with them ... they are some of my favorites! They remind me of Mother Earth. Actually, they ARE from Mother Earth and sometimes I feel bad when so much of her has been mined and taken for folks like me to purchase or find and stash away in our collections. I do try to give back to Mom Earth so that perhaps I will be forgiven my love for so many rocks ... I love to hold them and look at them ... sometimes I sleep with them under my pillow or just hold them ... and, of course, I love to wear some jewelry ... give me raw gems...polished, yes, but no need for diamonds for me! Look at a cubic zirconia ... doesn't look different much without a jeweler's eye, but you can't pretend with an awesome chunk of Mom ... amethysts, garnets, turquoise, rhodochrosite, and one I DID buy in jewelry form...a ring with Moldavite! last week. I splurged ... it is referred to as the "only extraterrestrial gemstone quality tektite" and even though if I didn't know what it was I wouldn't be fond of its green color, I love it now. I also feel strongly that each rock holds its own metaphysical properties and that is another aspect I resonate with.

I wanted to stop by so as to give myself a boost to get back into the practice of writing on here. Bear with me while I slowly get back into gear ... it's been a while and I used to love posting and commenting with friends. The Blogger has changed quite a bit since I first got on here, I think, in 2008 or so ... and I'll keep checking in and maybe someday again an old friend or even a new one will stop by and leave a comment or two. I leave you now with the words of Wavy Gravy, host supreme of the original Woodstock:

"There is always a little Heaven in a disaster area!"

***

from your SisSTAR

Kylita

xo

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Yes, I've been addicted to Facebook ;o(

How do I begin?

firsts of all, I'll take baby steps and see where they lead me!

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I cannot believe that it has been since January!!! that I last posted here! I know, I know, stick my face into "facebook" and I seem to disappear from view for hours upon hours! I'm famous for friending and unfriending at a whim ... not really a whim, but whenever it seems that if a 'friend' isn't interested in communicating, then what's the point, eh?

I have thought about some of my wonderful 'old' blog friends from days of yore! I am thrilled that Dancin' Fool is one of my fb friends also! I can keep track of her a little that way, except I was thrilled to see some of her older blog posts just now! I have some catching up to do.

This photo shows me on my wonderful kitchen lineoleum ... which came from a "staycation" quite a few years ago when we had time off but nowhere to go, or so it seemed. So with money I would've vacationed somewhere with, I chose to re-do the kitchen floor and buy an awesome "art" table and chairs for our little kitchen to spruce it up a bit and make it more "my own" ... it having been my mother's for many, many years.

The name of this lineoleum was Twinkle Rosaborealis or something like that ... the ad suggested it'd be great in a child's bathroom! Huh??? No way! It's spread all over the kitchen in all its glory and it makes dancing in the kitchen so much more fun!

let's see if I can find the table now.....

?hmmmmmmm????

***

it's a little covered up with placemats but it's a "Color Study" by Kandinsky ... when I realized who Kandinsky was and his artwork, I was quite surprised I fell in love with it so much. I wanted "Sleeping June" or whatever that painting was of the beautiful young girl sleeping with her orange dress flowing all over in a heap ... then I realized I didn't want my husband eating off her skirt! tee hee! The "fat-butt" black chairs don't show here much either, but they are great and have served us well. The table also has a special chrome insert to make it a "pub table" so we can think we are tipping our steins somewhere classy now and then! usually we're too lazy to change them around and haul in the "pub chairs" ... But ... all this is pretty common drivel I type but I just wanted to make sure that I could still have a go at it!

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The end of April I finally broke down and bought a digital camera. I have been having great fun on it and posting stuff on our NEW computer also ... yes, usually on facebook! I just realized, with great relish, that my blog would be a wonderful place to share my photos, just as I always have loved to do!!!

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I always have been eating vegetarian for over a year now ... and have felt pretty good about that. I have wanted to make more of a change to vegan and it's amazing to realize how MUCH that can involve! Like, I never knew!!! that 35 mm film is made from gelatin, which is made from animal bones! Yikes! And I have loved my Canon T50 for so long! or that match heads have gelatin on them somehow??

I'm willing to give up honey, cheese--one of these days, ice cream--any time now!, and on and on. Sad to say, that "new" car we bought last year is complete with all leather interior, which at the time seemed "luxe" but now it just seems like I am sad to be sitting on the hide of a dead cow (I can only hope it isn't any other poor dead animal!) ... we were sort of in a rush to get another vehicle since my 17yr old T-Bird had rotted away from the frame ;o( ... I cried as they drove her off, donated her to the Vietnam Vets of Michigan...wasn't even able to get the tax deduction of $1,600 we were given receipt for...tax laws had changed ... grrrrrr, crap, damn, frick! But, hopefully it went to a good cause and someone somewhere is riding to a decent job in my beautiful old T-Bird, moonlight blue with mocha cloth!!! interior.....I will remember that cloth interior NEXT time I'm in the market for a vehicle!

***

It's way past the middle of August now and we haven't been anywhere this summer. Maybe in our dreams we have, and we did have a 5-day "staycation" again ... sometimes it's just easier to stay home than to fight the road construction everywhere and the traffic ... and we'd miss our Tuffy Boy!

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(Tuffy Boy is awesome!)

We have had Tuf now for nearly 6 years. He showed up on our Mandy Girl's grave when I was weeding flowers ... a few weeks after my cousin, brother and dog had died, here is this beautiful orange tabby cat flopping down at my feet crying and reowing for mercy and it was something I was not ready for...at all! I tried to discourage him from staying ... I didn't want to deal with loving and losing another pet ... but the Universe had another plan ... and ...I BETTER STOP!!! I nearly lost this post with some techno glitch ... and found it hidden somewhere!

SO!!!!! I will leave you with a promise that I shall return much more regularly ... and try my best not to be so very mundane as I have just now! It was my practice trial run of getting back into the game, the blogger game! I have missed you and am excited to share again ... Thanks again if anyone has waded through ... You are sent highest and best blessings from your

SisSTAR Kylita!!!!

Yay!!!!

I

Posted

Again!!!

XO

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Nightie Night, Bloggie Souls!

(gotta go back to dancin' in the kitchen!)

XOXOXOXO

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Happy New Year...or should I say February 1st?

In just 40 minutes it will be February 1, 2012!! Where is the time flying to?? Oh, yes, oblivion! Well, I suppose that is why some of us love to take pictures and share them with others, to hold a moment in time in our mind's eye so that when we see something interesting...or something beautiful...we can remember it in a concrete way. I have two huge dresser drawers full of photographs I have taken over the years and a friend, before she up and moved to Tennessee, near the Smoky Mtns, gave me a beautiful photo album, because she believed in my "eye" for photography ... urged me in the past to use it in a career somehow. Just as I have been told, "You could be a writer!" or "You could be a photographer!" or a "singer", etc. etc., I feel that Yes, I AM all of those! The money may have not been flowing in, but the satisfaction of some pictures and poems and songs and such have been timeless and priceless! I miss posting new photos on my computer, but our media player thingy has been broken quite a long time ... and until we update or buy another, that is as it will be. So, ever though my husband has wanted to get me a digital camera forever, I remain in love with my old Canon T-50 35 mm ... and does well for me and love the zooms ... I will join the Future someday and get a digital and figure out how to use it and how to upload photos or download or ?? and share something NEW with my beloved blog followers or facebook friends ... would really love to be brave and share some photos of MYSELF as I am right now ... at 60 years old. That is a little scary but, hey! I see this face in the mirror everyday ... and I'm getting used to her a lot more. I love my long white hair ... like to call it platinum ;o) and I make faces at myself...my before and after ... no photoshopping here! I can look grouchy, mean, cantankerous and yet also peaceful, calm, serene, blissful and even sometimes...in just the right moment in time, lovely..........and sometimes I am taken aback at how I can look into my blue eyes and see my mother's looking back. She had snow white hair, also, but she kept hers very short and always wanted me to, also. But I'm rebellious! I've let it grow ... even though driving in the car on a very cold winter day, with very dry air and static electricity, the whole lot of it will poof up into my face like 1,000 antennae feeling for every pore ... and I'm cursing it and trying to get it to stop being unruly ... and it just keeps flying up in my face like 1,000 granddaddy longleg spiders ... (not a fun thought, actually) ... but ... my eyes ... mom used to tell me I had "bedroom eyes" and I always took that to mean something dirty or bad ... now I have bags under my eyes from not enough sleep ... or too much stress. But the blue is still pretty clear and they see not only outside myself, but they also trust my Third Eye (and I have no color what that is...unless it is pale violet) and I see marvelous things............lovely things that I've worked hard for ... like peace and joy, love and happiness ... understanding and tolerance for others ... the utmost love and respect for sentient beings, and I hold in my heart all of you out there who are reading my words ... with this prayer/poem/affirmation, whatever you want to call it.......I've shared it before, but what comes round goes round as they say, so this is dedicated to all of you, and all the animals and birds and creatures in the sea ... Mother Earth and the Multiverses and anything or anyone at all that needs a lift up, a leg up, some upliftment today...or the days, months, years after you might be reading this...and here it goes, my SisSTARS and Brothers:

May you be held in deepest Compassion

May all your Suffering and Pain find Ease

May you be at Peace

and Live in Joy...

...Compassion

and Ease

and Joy

and Peace...

ALWAYS!

WITH LOVE,

FROM

YOUR SisSTAR

XOXOXO

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Last Day of November!?

Wow! I can't believe how time flies ~~ ~~ (time flying ;oD) ... Yes, I have been lost in facebook-land and finding that I've gotten my feelings hurt there, which no one really knows about nor would care, I do believe. I won't go into the boring details but for some reason I up and "unfriended" 20 people about 10 days ago. I miss some of them, yet most of the ones were people I rarely heard anything from, some absolutely NOTHING ... and others were friends of a friend whose friend hurt my feelings (or, I should say, I allowed! my feelings to be hurt?!) so I just said heck with it ... I did keep a few people from that "tribe" as we'd called ourselves, as they've been so very kind and loving ... I would get angry when people would talk about facebook as "fakebook" and that the friends weren't real but imaginary. I'd defend that and say that this group of people were like minded for me and spiritually centered ... and yet funny and a little bit risque even! But, alas, it is what it is .... I never would have known them if I hadn't been on facebook.......which has taken me away from talking to friends on the phone, too busy to do the dishes, too enthralled to write letters (which I truly love to do!), too "curious" to read the many volumes of books I always loved to read ... in other words, I do believe I've been addicted to facebook. I'm thinking of shit-canning it altogether, leaving it intact and putting it on the back burner to see if I can come up with enough of a life which isn't lived in e-virtual-ness enough to actually have a friend over, or visit one, or write to one or talk to one! There's a lot of talk about what "we" could, would, want to, will do on there, but most live tons of miles away .... I can barely get a peep out of people I actually DO know or family members! So those virtual strangers I'd met have been a big part of my life the past 6 months or more ... which is a lot of time when it is intensified.......but to feel excluded, shunned, "restricted" is to go smack back to elementary school when I was so painfully shy and would try to go up to a little group of girls on the playground and hang around them, inevitably one or more would annoyingly look at me and say, "What do YOU want, NOSEY!" That's exactly what it felt like ... just not being good enough or ??? enough to fit in with someone who really should mean nothing to me at all!? Go figure!

I was so thrilled just now when I bopped on here and saw a favorite bloggie Soul post a comment to my last entry! Just yesterday she wrote to me! How exciting! and another one posted a comment I haven't responded to yet but I sooooo appreciated his acknowledgment of my little goofy story and how he and his wife could relate about buying very expensive frameless glasses that I am paranoid I'll scratch or break ... and have to be soooo careful cleaning them!
There is a certain instant gratification with facebook that I don't get here because a lot of my ol' blogger buddies don't seem to be posting either. We all go through different phases ... like the moon, which tonight, by the way, looked like that big Cheshire Cat grin which I love to see up in the dark black sky!!! I see it at the most opportune moments when I'm feeling low or sad.....without realizing it's up there, I'll often catch a glimpse of it and it ALWAYS makes me smile and even laugh out loud ... from the little fingernail crescent to the big grin just before the half moon.....I do like simple pleasures and I do love communicating with others, and how wonderful when those others can be like minded........or at least tolerant of other points of views without judgment.
Perhaps letting facebook sit awhile to stew in its juices (and oh, there's so MUCH of those on there! a veritable hodgepodge of just ANYTHING instantly!) .... perhaps that would allow me to keep up my good work with my new vegetarian eating style ... a healthier regimen of walking ... getting that hula hoop I've wanted for several years now! Afterall, sitting in front of the computer at work, or on the phone at work ... then come home and jump on the computer to stare at facebook after a very quick scan of my regular emails ... well, let's just say "secretarial spread" is a big problem of the keester! Oh, and speaking of keesters!!! My "new-to-me" 2007 Saturn Aura is equipped with butt warmer seats! They are coming in pretty darned handy in this very cold weather we are having. Last night was the first snow that actually stayed on the ground. But then it was bright and sunshiny all day as opposed to yesterday's gloomiest, rainiest day ever ... 2-1/2" and then turned to snow overnight @;@ But what do I expect for Nov. 30th!?
Today is my nephew's 29th birthday. I miss him. I haven't seen him since May of 2007 when we told him he couldn't live here any more. I guess he showed us, eh? Never one communication from him since ... and he even had a little boy and never told us. Well, I'm kind of used to being that SisSTAR of the C.O.D.E., that Childless...Orphaned...Daughter...of Enlightenment. It isn't always enlightening to realize your family doesn't care enough about you to contact you for years on end, or that your family equals 2 humans and a cat ^;^ but that's the way it is. It's a good family, though, even though Cat scratched the crap out of my hand yesterday! He was ticked off because it was pouring rain and his shelters we made for him outside were all wet and soggy with no chance to replace them yet ... and he hates to stay inside too much, even with a foot of snow! So he was a big grouch and I was massaging his little toes - WRONG!! He teased me by spreading his paw so I could give him Mama's famous "kitty massage" and "little toes" massage when he struck quick and hard and I have 8 claw marks on my right hand to prove it. I like to call it my vaccination from him ... as I used to be allergic to cats but don't seem so much with him...........unless I am just deluded because I love him so much............and he bites the hand that feeds him! ............well, that's it for another day, Bloggie Souls! I'd love to hear from you!! I hope the new year will be a new time to reconnect and elevate our consciousnesses to greater degrees...........with Love, Truth, Justice, Compassion, Tolerance, Kindness...and did I say LOVE?
with Love.........from your SisSTAR XOXOXOXOXO